Mr. Milonakis the 3rd.

I had typed a post called “Brokenhearted" I had refer to one of the boys as the “the other” well his name is Andrew. He might get mad at me for posting this but it is what it is “THE TRUTH”. He probably won’t read it SoOoooo. In September it will make three years I known him. We go out off and on since freshmen year, now I am going into my senior and it’s like where do we stand. One of the reason why we broke up was I didn’t call him for his birthday. I was like WTF are you serious; I felt where he was coming from when he didn’t call me for my birthday. That not a good enough reason to break up with someone, well we broke up for pity reasons like that. Out of the three years the longest I went out with him was 2 months then we break up. We won’t talk for a couple of months then we get back together and then it repeats itself.

I remember my friends was telling me to break up with him, that he is deep down south fucking some girl somewhere, How he is a clown etc. They don’t know Andrew like I know Andrew, so I didn’t listen to them. I did what I had to do, I loved him and I still DO. It’s just the little games that he plays, it like dayum you about to turn 19 when will it stop. The only reason why I keep taking him back it’s just that one thought “maybe he will change”. I have my hope up high; you can’t change a person unless he is willing to change himself. I actually cried over him, me crying over a boy.SMH. I told myself that he is not even worth my tears because I know he is not going to change so why cry or even try again. SHIT, I doubt that nikkah cried over me so why cry over him. The only reason why most of friends don’t like him because I only tell them the pity shit that he does. I learned over the years I can’t tell people shit about Andrew, they always like WTF why you still with him. The only person I tell everything is TAQIYYA (BfF); she has no choice but to listen. Jk.

In the post “Brokenhearted” I compare Donald and Andrew. I said “I spend every weekend with Donald and I see the other once a year. I love them both but I love the other one more. Why does shit have to be so dam complicated?” I think I love Andrew more because he been there from the beginning and he is my first LOVE. Donald, I can tell him anything, I love him he is the person I know wont never hurt me. I also said “I always tell them both that action speaks louder than words. The other just says the words, while Donald says the words and also does the action. That is what I mean when I said I settle for less.” I don’t even have to ask Donald if he miss me, he just say it and I believe him. ANDREW he is always like I miss you only if you me miss. WHAT?

Ook last time I went out with Andrew was last august and broke up in October. He cheated, got caught, and he lied about it. I haven’t talked on the phone with him since. He would im on AIM, but by the time I hit him back he signed off. I hate talking on aim, if I haven’t talked to you in a min. I like the old ways, talking on the phone for hours. That whole aim and texting thing is wack because you might miss read what the person had said. He im me on AIM. I told him to text me because my aim sucks on my phone, Blah Blah Blah we texting, we texting. Then all of a sudden he texted “I want you”. I had to read the text twice to see if this nikkah really wrote this. Mad shit just went through my head. I want to curse him out, I have talked him ever since October and you drop this on me in august. Almost a whole year later, he wasn’t serious. I hate wasting my time knowing that the shit won’t last. We tried 3 year, if it didn’t work the first time what the difference about this time. This shit is so frustrating, I want to be with you and then I don’t. Andrew is the same little boy I started going out with in 06, dayum its 09, where the MAN at. If I do get back with Andrew, what about Donald. I will not do the same shit Andrew did to me, to Donald. Drop him for another person. That would be fucked up and he doesn’t deserve that at all. This is what Andrew also text “Im sorry i love you to i want you to be the one i spend the rest of my life you and im really sorry for all i put you throw. You been there for me for the last 3 years you are everything i ever wanted in a woman and i can see myself being with you for the rest of my life” This shit is so confusing. I love Andrew with all my heart, I am just asking for a change. Then I will think about me and him. He act like one person when he is with me and another when he is DEEEEEEP in the south. I just miss the person I was with last summer, I loved that person, He wasnt acting like a little boy then. He was acting like the man I LOVE. I just miss my PUNK, who uses to call at 8 and finish 3 in the morning.
-Jay.Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ